As a boss mother of two on maternity leave, A’Nyah Dismukes details her daily routine.
She does two feedings at night, one feeding at 3 am, then she may sleep for three hours. In the Dismukes household, 6:30 am the start of a new day. This is when she gets Robyn, 3, ready for school. Around 9:30 is nap time for Dismukes and baby Karsyn. After some much-needed rest, it’s time for business. Dismukes works on her budget for the next few months and reaches out to vendors to get business operations back in order. She anticipates her pending return to the salon. Around 3 pm, Robyn comes home from school. While Robyn is taking her nap, dinner is getting prepped. They all have dinner together. Dismukes loves to lay the girls down around the same time.Â
“I don’t beat myself up about what I don’t get done during the day,” Dismukes explained. “I just know that I get another 24 hours tomorrow.”
Although Dismukes life’s purpose is related to the arts, those who have had their hair slayed by her gifted hands would never guess what her former passion was. Dismukes was sure that she wanted to be a professional dancer in high school. As a student at Central High in Newark, NJ, there were tons of Black history-based dance programs. She became more well-rounded in jazz, tap, and ballet. Dismukes was certain that she could join a college dance team by the college. No one could tell her differently. She was determined that dance would be in her future.Â
Fully engrossed in her journey of motherhood, Dismukes lives by the saying, “Stop and smell the roses.” Robyn, her firstborn, was a 28-weeker. It seemed like everything was moving extremely slowly at first. The Newark native understands that she shouldn’t be so wrapped up in work. She has to slow down and enjoy the moment as her daughters grow older.Â
“It’s their world, and I’m just living in it,” she smiled.
Over the past four years, Dismukes has learned a great deal about herself. She’s a hard worker and is highly resilient. Although she is introverted and shy, there is no time to miss out on opportunities when she has children at home to take care of. She wears a coat of confidence for her daughters. When Robyn was a preemie in the NICU, older parents wondered how Dismukes stuck it through the challenges that came their way. Since Robyn was born, Dismukes was determined to be strong for her.Â
“The first example of strength needs to come from home,” Dismukes explained.
When asked how her girls are similar to how she was as a child, Dismukes recalled, “The girls’ facial expressions are identical to mine.” Dismukes added that “Robyn is as sassy as I was, and her inquisitiveness is a sure sign that she is my kid.”Â
With the many highlights of motherhood, there is plenty of cause for worry and concern.
Dismukes shares that her biggest fear is getting out to date again. She never wants her girls to think that she puts a man or anything before them. She’s more afraid to disappoint them than anything else in the world. The mother of two addresses one justifiable worry. As a Black mother of two young girls, Dismukes worries about the possibility of having a Black son. The current social climate is terrible.
“I cannot imagine having cops ring my doorbell to tell me that my son was arrested or a cop accidentally killed him.” “I have a brother whom I love like he’s my child, and that anxiety makes me think about how I’ll feel when I have my Black son.”
Dismukes takes the idea that it takes a village a step further. She believes that having a sound support system is what helps her overcome challenges. It makes a difference to have part of her village there by her side during the toughest of times.Â
Recently, Dismukes took complete control of her life. A few weeks before giving birth to Karsyn, when there were so many questions about her decision-making, something clicked. She started making small decisions that were best for her and her children, then every other aspect of her life seemed to fall into place. Â
Dismukes recalls when Robyn told her that she was her best friend and considered it the happiest, fondest memory she will cherish forever.
She believes that she must be kind to herself because she cannot take care of her girls if she doesn’t take care of herself. What good is she to her children and anyone else around her if she’s not whole or in good spirits?
In the next five years, Dismukes hopes to be ahead stylist for New York Fashion Week in addition to working with Vogue and Coach.